Allgemein Archive - Page 3 of 158 - The Art of Communicating

The leap to our vision

Here’s why some leaders struggle to align their team behind their vision: They haven’t made the leap from “my vision” to “our vision”.

When it’s “my vision”, why should the team care? They will do their job because they’re paid to do so. But anything more than that? You will need some decent persuasion skills and perhaps have to drop in an incentive or two.

But when it’s “our vision”, that’s a different journey. It’s as much their drive as it is yours. Even if they might not burn for it just as much as you do, the team is intrinsically motivated to get there.

So, what about “your vision” makes it “our vision”? How does it align with what matters to the team? Where’s the common drive?

A great way to find out is through conversations. Great visions aren’t usually crafted at night, sitting at a desk in a dark office. Much more often, they are the results of curiosity and exploration, asking questions and listening closely to what others have to say.

The better you understand what matters to the people on your team, the better you’ll be positioned to transition from “your vision” to “our vision”, a vision that not only motivates you but the whole team.

PS: Reach out if you need support.

Less

We often default to adding more details to clarify our points. But did you ever notice how more details sometimes lead to even more confusion?

When more won’t help, less might. Yet, seldom do we consider subtracting an aspect or two to stop the confusion.

Have you experienced that?

On to something new

Heading there means leaving here.

Change becomes easier once we acknowledge that.

What will we gain?
But also, what will we miss?

What’s pulling us ahead?
But also, what’s holding us back?

Some change initiatives fail because they are framed as “here it’s bad” vs “there it’s glorious”.

But it’s hardly ever black and white.
In fact, it’s often not an easy choice.
For some team members, it’ll be a tough journey.

Instead of dismissing the “here”, it would make it easier for them if we embraced the fact that some things have actually been pretty good over here.

In moving forward, we do not have to forget the past.

We can carry forward our experiences, our lessons,
the very essence of who we are.

This is what transforms the journey into our journey.

Irrational audiences

If you are a rational person, chances are you’re sometimes deeply frustrated when people just don’t get it.

I’ve certainly been in the past.

I mean, sometimes it’s so obvious … 
the logic is flawless …
the data clear …
but this guy almost refuses to get it.

That can be so frustrating.

Yet, there’s no point in complaining.

As much as we would like our audiences to be fully rational in their decision making, sooner or later we will encounter one that just isn’t.

That’s when logic won’t do the job.

I mean, of course you’re free to dismiss that audience.

But if that’s not an option, the only other option is to figure out a way to somehow resonate on an emotional level. Not to dismiss the logic (after all, it’s still valid), but to open a side door that allows the conversation to take place even if you can’t agree on the logic.

This is something I’ve seen brilliant people shy away from who devalue “emotional arguments” as, well, “irrational”. But I think that’s a mistake.

An emotional side door to the argument doesn’t devalue the rational main entrance. It doesn’t make the argument any less true.

But it allows people access to your insights that would otherwise have to stay outside.

The misunderstanding here is to consider rational the opposite of emotional. It’s not.

If you craft the emotional appeal in a way that is true to the logic, then it’s actually another facet of the same thing.

Give it a try!

How do you deal with a situation where people just don’t seem to get the logic?

Relevance beats elegance

If I can’t relate to a speaker’s words, it doesn’t matter how beautiful their slides are, how elaborate their body language is, or how creative their storytelling is.

It might be nice but it’s also pointless.

If, on the other hand, they manage to make it highly relevant, I will tolerate an ugly slide or two and a little nervousness.

In other words, work on your story’s relevance before you begin to work on the show.

The good news is that when it’s relevant, a great show will only amplify the impact.

How exciting is your pitch deck?

If you’re not excited by your pitch deck, chances are your audience won’t be, either.

It’s something that has always baffled me: how far some people will go to defend a mediocre presentation with rational arguments when there’s a very simple metric to decide whether you’ve nailed it:

Does it make you feel excited?

If it doesn’t, there’s no use in arguing that it contains all the facts. Or that it’s logically structured.

If all of that is true and it still doesn’t make you feel excited, it means that your story isn’t working.

Sometimes, it’s indeed because the facts aren’t right, but in my experience it’s much more often the words people use to speak about the facts that aren’t right.

How about your pitch? Are you excited by it?

Feels right

Some narratives just 
won’t go away.
Why?

The data is clear.
Yet people believe the lie.
But why?

Because it feels right.
That’s why.

—

People aren’t good at feeling data.

That’s why it’s hard to compete on facts with a story that resonates on an emotional level.

If something feels right, we’re pretty good at coming up with good reasons for why it is right. If something just is right but feels wrong, that’s much harder.

Have you had that experience?
How did you deal with it?

Should you give that talk?

A single “yes” to one of these questions might be enough of a reason to go for it:

Will the ideas you share make a profound difference in your audience’s life?

Is your story inconvenient but your audience needs to hear it?

Can you grow personally by preparing for, showing up, or speaking up at this event?

Does the thought of standing on that stage make you feel excited?

Is there a reasonable chance your insights could spark meaningful conversations within the audience?

Are you providing a voice for those who cannot speak up in this context?

Will sharing your experiences or knowledge help others navigate their challenges more effectively?

What would you add?

Finding the right words matters so much

Great storytelling fuels influence.
Which is good, bad, and ugly … some thoughts on how to deal with bullshitters:

If you manage to tell a story that resonates well with many people, you can make a huge impact.

The good is that this power is available to everyone.

The bad is that “everyone” includes the bullshitters.

The ugly is that bullshitters often wield storytelling as a tool to manipulate or mislead, rather than to enlighten or entertain. They shamelessly ignore the truth. It’s just not a concept that matters to them.

The only question that matters to a bullshitter is:
Does the story work to their advantage?
When it works it’s just fine. True or not.

Now, this is important to understand: They are not exactly lying. In order to lie, they would need to care for the truth. Which they don’t. They are simply not interested in the truth. They are only interested in achieving their goals.

Here’s where people get it wrong: They assume that bullshitters would be similar to themselves. That deep inside even a bullshitter would care for the truth. That they just need to be convinced of the facts.

But that’s not how bullshitters roll.

They don’t care about the truth.
Therefore, they don’t care about facts.
Therefore, they can’t be convinced by facts, no matter how hard you try.

Bullshitters care about whether it works. Nothing else matters to them. Again: They couldn’t care less about whether they are right or wrong.

If a story resonates, they will tell it.
If a made-up story resonates better,
they will switch to that story.

You shouldn’t treat them as similar to you. They are not. Unlike yourself, they have no sympathy for the truth.

The only thing that can make make them stop what they’re doing is when their story stops working.

And that, essentially, means that you need to tell better stories.

You need to find a way to tell the truth in a way that resonates stronger than the bullshitter’s made-up story.

That, I think, is the only way.

And it’s why – in times like ours – finding the right words matters so much.

Telling stories is something that bullshitters really excel at. You need to become better at it.

For example …
 … when bullshitters are extraordinarily good at making their audience feel heard, you need to become even better at understanding people’s struggles and desires.

… when bullshitters promise the blue from the skies, you need to become even better at finding words that resonate strongly but that are grounded in the truth.

In other words, we need to shift our focus away from trying to convince the bullshitter (which is never going to work) and onto the people we want to resonate with.

The more empathy we have for them, the better our stories can become.

The better our stories become, the better they can spread.

The better they spread, the bigger their impact.

That flavor of impact starts with empathy, honesty, and the will to find the right words.

If you care for the truth and want it to have impact, you need to care for finding true stories that resonate strongly.

What’s your strategy of dealing with bullshit?

The other side of listening

Listening is mostly considered to be about filtering the most out of what’s being said. But there’s another side to it.

Being listened to.

It changes the conversation profoundly.

Try to think back to a situation where someone made you feel listened to?

How did you feel?
What changed for you?
In the way you opened up?
Which turn did the conversation take?

It feels very much like a gift, doesn’t it?

Great leaders often excel at it. They’re not only good listeners in the sense that they are aware of what’s being said. They’re also good at giving others that feeling of being listened to.

They truly give their full attention.

Who gave you that gift recently? What can you learn from them?

PS: One could even argue that you’re only really listening when it gives the speaker the feeling of being heard.

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