Dr. Michael Gerharz, Autor auf The Art of Communicating

How does it feel to be persuaded?

Perhaps something like this …

Let’s imagine you’re listening to a skilled speaker. They’re well rehearsed and obviously know what they’re talking about.

But still, you’re feeling a bit of skepticism mix with your curiosity as they present their ideas. A subtle guard rises within you, a natural defense against being swayed or manipulated.

But they skillfully weave emotional appeals and logical arguments. You notice your skepticism battling with intrigue. Their words are like a gentle but persistent nudge against your existing beliefs.

You find yourself momentarily swayed by a particularly compelling point …

… only to retreat back into doubt.

The speaker seems to sense these waves of resistance. They become more insistent, more persuasive.

You feel a growing tension to agree.

It’s not exactly uncomfortable, but it’s definitely there.

There’s a part of you that wants to give in, to align with this persuasive narrative just to alleviate the growing tension within you.

When the presentation ends, you’re left feeling a bit unsettled. You find yourself agreeing with some points …

But …

Did you agree because the arguments were sound, or because the art of persuasion subtly wore down your defenses?

The art of persuasion is a fascinating one. And yet, I prefer it when leaders light the path.

Both aim to create tension that leads to change. But the former does it in the speaker’s best interest while the latter does it in the audience’s best interest.

I’m so excited

The crucial question that’s almost never asked when preparing a talk:

Am I excited?

Instead, preparation is dominated by “Does it make sense?”

Which is crucial, too. But does your gut agree? Are you excited?

Make no mistake: Logic is important! But the difference between good and great talks is often the passion that comes with the latter.

The good news is this: It’s not hard to find out whether you’re excited, is it?

“Does it make sense?” is tricky. You need research, fact checks, data, reasoning, etc.

But “Am I excited”?

That’s easy. Just listen to your gut. It’s an immediate answer.

Then, work with the answer:

If it’s a “yes”, go out there and light the path!

If it’s a “no”, dig deeper. What’s off? What’s missing? What’s just corporate speak that just isn’t you? Where could you be bolder? Shorter? More emotional?

That’s the beauty of it. You only need to start that process, even if it’s with the most boring story. If you let your gut guide you, you’re going to end up with a story that excites you – one that feels like this is how you always wanted to tell your story!

So, how excited are you about your story?

Alignment vs. Agreement

Alignment is when we walk the same path.
Agreement is when we walk the same path for the same reason.

A lot of frustration in communication stems from trying to achieve agreement when alignment would be sufficient.

Let’s say you care for sustainability and you suggest some initiatives to save energy and emissions.

How important is it that the CFO agrees with you about the why behind those initiatives? Would it be a show stopper if they see a financial benefit but don’t agree with you on the deeper purpose of (this particular approach to) saving the planet?

I’ve seen brilliant ideas die in ideological battles around the why when the destination was all that actually mattered.

Once you’re on the way, you might discover that there is, in fact, a lot more common ground than you thought. Alignment might turn into agreement down the road.

But if you’re not even willing to start the journey unless there’s agreement, alignment might not happen in the first place. And, as a consequence, change can’t happen.

How about you? Did you – or someone on your team – ever let agreement get in the way of alignment?

The only one

Right now, nothing is more important than you.
That’s the feeling that great communicators will give you.

Not only in 1:1 conversations, but also on the stage and even in their writing.

Right now, nothing is more important than you.

Which is not to be confused with:
“Never is anything more important.”

But right in this moment, nothing is.

These people let us forget that
-> they are just as busy as we are (if not more),
-> that they juggle just as many balls as we do (if not more),
-> that their day sucked big time and their lunch break is already one hour late (if not more).

But right now, none of that matters.

They are super busy. And yet, in this moment, they are fully present.

They don’t necessarily leave everything aside for us. We’re not the center of their focus all the time. They might not even have much time for us. But when they do, they’re fully committed and present in the moment.

Sometimes, you could even say that the feeling is not so much one of being the most important person in their world right now. It almost feels like you’re the only one that matters.

How focussed are you on the person you are talking to?

Proud to work here

How many of your team members tell their families and friends that they are genuinely proud of working in your team?

Are you yourself proud of working here?
Why or why not?

Are you proud of your employees?
Why or why not?

What would you expect your employees to be proud of?

When was the last time you asked?

Getting people’s support

There’s almost no limit in getting people’s support when supporting you gets them what they want.

This alignment, of course, gets easier the better you understand what it is that they want?

It sounds like a cliché but great communication really does start with listening.

Can’t stop thinking about it

If you can manage to plant one thought in my head that I can’t stop thinking about, you’ve achieved more than most other talks.

Don’t even bother with planting a dozen thoughts until you can manage to plant that one thought in my head.

When it works and I really can’t stop thinking about it, it’s hard to believe that I wouldn’t want to know the second thought. And the third.

What’s a thought that you would like to plant in my head?

Choose your audience

Ever tried playing Jazz to a Metal crowd?
It’s fun to watch.

Even more so when the Jazz fan tries to convince the Metal crowd that Jazz is actually better music.

They just won’t believe you. No matter how brilliant your music is to a Jazz crowd.

Jazz bands will have a much better time playing in front of a Jazz crowd.

Their impact will be bigger, too.

The same applies to marketing.

Choose your audience wisely.

Embracing the blank stare

For some, it’s a huge source of frustration.
For others, it’s a gift.

The blank stare on people’s faces when you tell them about your great idea but they just don’t get it.

So, how is that a gift?

It’s information. It tells you that either your idea or your explanation needs improvement. Not only that. The blank stare tells you exactly where.

Pay attention to when exactly the blank stare occurs and you know where you need to improve your idea or your story.

Don’t give up until the blank stare is resolved.

But wait, there’s one exception: Your idea might not be for everyone.

Don’t waste time on optimizing your story for those who will never get it. Own their blank stare and make it even stronger for the people who you’re making it for.

Of course

The most compelling “aha moments” create an “of course effect”.

It’s that sudden realization or enlightenment you experience once you see a solution or idea that seems incredibly obvious in hindsight.

It feels like a blend of surprise and certainty.
A sense of simplicity and inevitability.

“Why haven’t I thought of that? It’s so obvious!”

To create one for your audience, the insight itself is not enough. You need clarity in your communication, too.

Can you lead your audience to that moment of realization where everything suddenly clicks into place and they experience the of-course effect?

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